God, change the things I can change. Accept the things I can’t change. Give me the wisdom to be able to see the difference in the two.
I get really intrigued when people say, all you have to do in order to change is just do it! While I strongly believe that action is required for change, it can be a very difficult feat. I have noticed that people who try to take on a new habit they’ve never experienced, doing so is actually a complex issue. I think it is important to understand why change does not occur. I have been studying a lot of Wyatt Woodsmall, President of Advanced Behavioral Modeling, Inc., teachings and in one of his lectures he mentions the four enemies of change. They are the following:
1) “Chance to” change, which means the system that a person is under does not allow change.
2) “Want to” change. One must have the willingness to change. If there is no motivation, there is no change.
3) “How to” change, which means they lack the training. We don’t know what to do or how to do it.
4) “Able to” change, which simply means we are unable to do it.
So now, the question is, what are the magical three approaches to facilitate change? First and foremost, lets be clear, the greatest enemy is distraction. In order to evolve and go to the next level you need to figure out where you are wasting your time, and re-purpose that time, so…
1) STOP WAISTING TIME ON DISTRACTIONS!! It is super critical to focus. We often think that the more options, the more possibilities, the better off we are. This is not the case. People get caught up in the alternatives and are distracted from the most important possibility.
2) One of the fastest ways to accomplish behavior change is to find a master/mentor/coach and say, “I am facing this challenge. Will you help me figure this out? Learn the way an expert does something, then duplicate that through the system. This is called “modeling.
3) Learn to align the head and the heart. Woodsmall describes this as the *Parts Alignment: He says, “There is something we want to do, and we are capable of doing it… yet we don’t do it. We don’t do it because a part of us wants to do it, while the other parts don’t. The parts that don’t want to do it is the part that is most in charge”.
More on Parts Alignment in my next post. I use a very easy circle of life wheel that discovers the parts of are missing, and how to infuse joy and satisfaction into your life.
Until next time love.
Call me when you can.